A friend asked me a question about her ex-husband treating the children to lavish gifts and trips when he has them, while she is struggling financially. She knew she should not say anything negative to her children about her ex, but she was finding it difficult in the face of her circumstances. She wanted my opinion about what can she do.
The holidays are upon us and it’s a time to have festive parties, family gatherings and tons of food and merriment. However, sometimes you feel overwhelmed and stressed during the holidays, resulting in feelings of sadness, anxiety and even depression. There are many reasons why this happens. First and foremost is that you may just be exhausted from all the planning, preparing, and family tension that sometimes increase during this time of year.
This is a tough and controversial subject. There are no right or wrong answers, nor are there any simplistic black and white solutions. I am sharing my own perspective, based on my own life experiences. I welcome you to contribute your own perspective as long as you are respectful of the rights of others to see the world in a different light.
You’re married and comfortable with your life then something happens. Whether you choose, or someone else make the decision for you, you’re going to face one of the toughest times of your life. But it doesn’t have to be for long.
No one wants to think that their marriage might be heading for divorce. The paperwork, legal fees, mental strain, disruption to routine, and potential custody or alimony battles are enough to put anybody off of making that confession to themselves. But, unpleasant and taxing as exploring the possibility of divorce can be, sometimes, it needs to be done. So how do you know when it’s time?
One of the toughest transitions for children of divorce is coping with the first holiday season. As parents our challenge is to create new traditions and activities that can replace the memories of family holidays in the past. Here are some suggestions for helping your children keep the best spirits through the holiday season.
All to often we are the ones giving other people something to talk about. Learn from our expert guest blogger and therapist, Erika Myers, how you can work together with your spouse and agree how to discuss your divorce with others.
It’s important to sit down as a family and talk about the divorce if at all possible. Having both parents discuss the plan really helps the kids feel more comfortable.
From my experience working with moms that are adjusting to a divorce, here are some of the more important themes/guidance:
As today’s guest blogger reminds us – marriage is about love, but divorce is about money.
So, though you may be on an emotional roller coaster right now, it’s in your best interest to stop and think about the “business” end of divorce. See what our guest and divorce financial expert has to say about becoming more knowledgeable about your finances as you and your husband consider a divorce: