Learning to Let Go and Start Over | DAWN - Michigan's Original Divorce Attorneys for Women
Learning to Let Go and Start Over

Learning to Let Go and Start Over

Today’s guest blogger provides lessons learned from her own divorce experience about moving on or “whiting out” those difficult and challenging times in life.

White Out

During our annual school supplies shopping spree, I discovered “White Out” was the item on the top of my daughter’s list. But she wanted the newfangled version, not the White Out of my generation. The previous iteration looked like a nail polish bottle with a brush that was used to paint on the error. Then you blew on the paper until the mistake ‘disappeared’.

But the new White Out looks like a mix between a tape dispenser and a space ship, adorned in pretty colors like neon green, orange and purple. It glides over the mistake and “poof” it’s gone, leaving a new clear space to continue typing or writing.

An analogy popped into mind the other day after yet another incident with my ex-husband. This time he put my daughter in a very disturbing position, bringing once again into to clarity his lack of awareness for her and her needs.

The reactionary part of me wanted to rip him a new “you know what.” But I paused, leaning on my experience, knowing that choice wouldn’t keep me in the white light and wouldn’t help my child.

Can you imagine if we all carried around a larger than life new version White Out? We could whip it out at a moment’s notice and simply white out all the nasty ugliness of life, including our and others’ mistakes.

It would help us create a sparkly clean white line to begin again and again. Well, I believe we do have that capability.

The spiritual “white out” is “love bombing,” which is sending white light instead of anger, hatred or ugliness to another person or situation.

My high-conflict divorce has taught me so much about my and my children’s abilities to choose what is best for ourselves and how to become neutral or non-reactive to another person’s “dark out.”

Here’s how to use white light “white out “energy for correction.

The newfangled spiritual white out is always with you. Go against the initial reaction to cross out the “mistake” over and over again, i.e., replaying it, fueling it with anger or resentment.

Instead, swipe the divine white out over it with your love essence. Visualize a white brilliant light washing over the incident.

Send the person, place or incident a love bomb of white out. Close your eyes and imagine an orb of white glowing light and then toss that light to the other person. It’s like playing catch; you just put down the dark energy ball and toss a white light energy ball back.

That’s the best kind of white out because it changes the look instantly from a “mistake” to crisp and clean love. I am in no way saying you are not entitled to feel what you are feeling about an exchange or difficult situation. However, it is empowering to white out the cycle of creating or staying in the dark side of emotions.

White it out!

Written by: Kristen Darcy, Author, Fertility & Divorce Coach, and Speaker


About the Author

Kristen Darcy is a noted author, coach, motivational speaker and expert on the emotional aspects of infertility, divorce, and other life challenges. Her philosophy is that we not only live through these challenges but we can thrive and inspire others along the way. www.kristendarcy.com

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