Sanctuary for Divorced Moms!

Feeling resistant to this idea? You’re not alone. Many divorced moms feel uncomfortable with the idea of taking time for themselves every day. Excuses such as lack of space, time or energy are common. The truth is resistance to this is really about not valuing yourself or prioritizing for your own well-being. That just won’t do if you want to have a happy and healthy life after divorce!

Here are some quick tips to help you get started and feel great about taking good care of yourself:

• Sanctuary time doesn’t have to be expensive or difficult to include in your day. You can start immediately.
• Pick a space in your home that feels relaxing, inspiring and provides some privacy. It could be your bedroom, kitchen table or comfy chair. It really doesn’t matter as long as it’s a place where you can relax and feel comfortable.
• Make a commitment to your sanctuary time. It’s an investment in your health and well-being.
• Your sanctuary time can be as long as you like, but even just 5 to 10 minutes is enough to help recharge your batteries.
• Set an intention. What do you want your sanctuary time to do for you? Lessen your stress? Help visualize your future? Get clear on a pressing problem? Be clear about what you want your time to do for you.
• Set clear boundaries. For example, if you are using your bedroom for your sanctuary, set up a boundary that your room is off limits to the kids after 7pm. Use that space/time for sanctuary.
• Put yourself first. Tell kids, roommates, etc. that you are not to be bothered during this time.
• Use all your senses when setting up your sanctuary: beautiful music, candles, soft lighting, incense, warm breezes (if you’re lucky enough to have those!), are all examples of what might be in your sanctuary. Inspire your spirit!
• Tune out the world. Turn off your TV, computer and phone. This is your time to disconnect from the busyness of life.
• Keep your space clean and inspiring. You may not be able to get to the rest of the house, but put an extra effort into keeping this one space clean and clutter free. Studies show that messy rooms add stress and a sense of overwhelm and confusion – the last things you want in your sanctuary or divorced-mom life!
• You can do anything you want with your sanctuary time, and you can change it up as you go along. Many of my clients use this time to journal or meditate. Others pray, paint or visualize their future. Any activity that quiets your mind and is soothing and calming to your spirit will do.
• Above all, ENJOY your sanctuary time! This is a gift you are giving yourself, and you deserve it. Taking time out every day to center yourself will assure a happy, healthy and productive life for you and your family.

Once you make the leap to regular sanctuary time you’ll wonder how you ever got by without it! It’s truly one of the best ways to support yourself and declare to the world that you are worthwhile and valuable.

Written By: Jeanie Rule, Founder and CEO of SoloMama