Being A Single Mom – 3 Key Things I Do Everyday
It hit me around 9:00 am that I felt as though I was dragging my body around and I stopped and wondered ‘why?’
Taking a break to think more clearly, I reminded myself that I woke at 4:30 a.m. and began my day with clear focus on what needed to get done to keep the “family machine” moving forward. I had begun my day replying to work email, shoveling the walk and clearing the snowstorm off my car, bringing my elderly neighbor her paper while being mindful not to fall on the icy driveway, organizing my work day, putting a load of wash into the washer and one into the dryer, making lunches by 5:00 am and showering and dressing for the day – all before waking up the kids at 6:15 a.m.
The next part of my day entailed leaving the house by 7:15am, driving one ½ hour to my kids’ school, dropping them off by 7:45am to then head to Trader Joe’s to grocery shop. Next zipping home to drop groceries, walk the dog and then settle in at my desk for a conference call by 9:00am.
I fell into my chair exhausted. And I wondered why?! The next thing I knew I received a text from my son…. I hadn’t signed the form he needed! Ugh! How could I have forgotten?
The single mom’s life is filled to the brim and without soul-filled focus upon you and your needs, the system will break down.
Let’s focus on our own single mom slogan “Happy Mama, Happy Life.” Here’s a list of three daily must-dos!
1. Compliment yourself!
With all the scheduling, managing, driving, food prep, household management, and the job responsibilities that come with working full-time, things are going to slip through the cracks. And let’s face it, it’s easy to focus on the slip-ups, the “Oh my God, I forgot to….”
Instead of “I should of’s” right in that moment compliment yourself!
As a single mom, there is just YOU! No tag team-mates to say “you drive, I’ll pick up,” or can you do ____fill in the blank. The leapfrog system doesn’t exist for a single mom. It’s just us jumping over ourselves to get it all done!
Each and every day it is imperative to compliment YOU.
Stop and say “Wow! You are great today!”
Each and every day after the morning crazy rush, when you are buckled up in the car, stop and together say “Yay team” Another job well done!
Children of a single mom know that all the pressure of life’s daily activities fall on your shoulders and the dance of holding it together needs acknowledgement for their sakes as well as yours.
Compliment yourself every day! Compliment your children and you as a family each and every day! Repeat often.
Each and every day you must connect to spirit.
However that looks, feels or sounds like for you, spirituality is personal and private and the practice of connecting and praying daily is very important and a must for single moms.
Sometimes, feelings of isolation and aloneness can be overwhelming and it is important to cultivate your spiritual connection because even though you are alone and you might feel lonely, you are never truly alone.
The spiritual world is supporting and guiding you. You are a spark of light and each and every day within your conscious creation or unconsciously creating, you are sharing your divine light.
A prayer is a simple thank you.
Upon waking, each and every day, I practice connecting to spirit by sitting on the side of my bed, feet dangling away at 4:30am and I say out loud “Thank You, I love my life.”
This is a simple prayer. You can also have a conversation with the Divine and ask for what you need, like you would ask a friend.
Ask for help.
Ask for guidance.
Ask for direction.
Ask for love.
Ask for support.
Ask for protection.
Ask for opening all possibilities of the highest and best for you and your children.
Ask for joy, peace, and fun.
3. Accept help when offered.
As a single mom, it may be challenging to ask for help. Well, it was for me. I’m a work in progress and getting better at it. For many of us, it is an incredible challenge to accept help when offered.
Do you accept help when offered? Or do you automatically reply:
No, I’ve got it!
I’m good thanks.
I’ll do it!
Or I’m fine!
Acceptance is a muscle that needs to be stretched and sometimes we need to be taught that it’s even there to begin with.
Accepting help when offered is not a sign of weakness. Nor is it a badge to wear. Accepting help when offered, is a sign of balancing the giving and receiving of energy, regardless if it is from your family, a friend or a complete stranger.
To balance the energy that we are and the energy that is all around us, means dancing between giving and receiving.
Allow the energy of receiving to be part of your day, each and every day. It can present itself in many forms; a stranger holding a door, someone allowing you to go first at a light, or a simply a smile.
Most importantly, teach by example that accepting help when offered creates a balance within and without.
Say all together now!!! ACCEPT HELP WHEN OFFERED!
These simple three daily acts can change the life a single mom.
Written by: Kristen Darcy
About the Author:
Kristen Darcy is a noted author, infertility coach, motivational speaker, divorce coach and expert on the emotional aspects of both infertility and divorce recovery.