Keys to Surviving Divorce

Here are some key factors to successfully navigating a divorce and coming out whole:

1. Stay away from the “blame game”. It’s too easy to blame your ex for marital problems and failures. Remember, there are things for you to learn about yourself that will serve you as you move forward with your life and relationships. Take the time to look in the mirror.
2. Send your ex off with “good wishes”. Forgive and let go. Unending and persistent anger and bitterness will not serve you well at the end of the time. Take the time to feel anger, hurt, sadness, and loss, but make sure you don’t live there forever.
3. If you’re working, keep working. If you’re not, find a job or volunteer position. Make sure you have a reason to get up and make a contribution to the world.
4. Don’t believe anyone who says that a woman is no longer desirable after 40+. It simply isn’t true. In fact, you chances of finding a man who appreciates intimacy and is ready to have a meaningful relationship goes up after 50. Women in their 40’s, 50’s and 60’s are so much better than their counterparts. Good men understand this and there are plenty of them out there. Your best relationship is waiting for you!
5. Create new goals and go after them! A new life is waiting for you. Take advantage of this opportunity to engage in new and exciting ways.

There’s a healthy balance while going through a divorce between letting go of the past and moving into the future. It is also normal to feel off balance as you live in that in between space. Be gentle and kind with yourself. Remember that these uncomfortable feelings are temporary. Don’t drag them out with any unnecessary court battles. At the end of the day, your life and happiness are what counts. So make each day count!

Writtne By:Julie Orlov, MAOL, MSW, LCSW, Psychotherapist, Relationship Coach, Speaker, and Author, Julie Orlov Consulting